Tuesday, November 1, 2011
I Know That It's Not All About Me
Its almost the dreaded three am and my pillow is severely tear stained. Since it is officially November 1, tomorrow is our fourth wedding anniversary. Or at least it would have been. I miss Chris terribly still. I can't help but feel like I'm being punished by being the lonely widow left behind. I must have committed some serious sins to have to live this life. I still feel like things are slowly falling apart beneath me. Ever since I lost Chris, it's been so hard to hold out hope that anything positive will happen again. I tried. But, it started to fall through, now I'm afraid that it's going to collapse. It seemed like life was so much easier when I was living in ignorance of death.