Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Every Day is a New Day

Every day brings with it a new emotion. For the past few months, I have been on a roller coaster ride of emotions. One day, I will wake up happy and so happy to be alive. The very next day, I will throw my covers over my head and vow not to get out of bed. Yet, for the past few days my emotions have been consistantly in the "good" range for a change. I've even been sleeping better. I've had a few bumps in the night, but nothing worth writing about. So, why this new attitude you might ask? It's because every day brings me closer to my goal. I've finally gotten my appointment that I've been waiting months and months for. And my plans are once again being put into action. I still have my moments where I get sad because Chris isn't here to share in this new life that I am living. But, I know that he isn't too far away. I also know that he is smiling down on me because I am making an effort to actively live my life again. This may not have been the life that I planned on living, but this is the life that I am being forced to live. So, I am making the best of it. I am embracing each new day and thankful for each one that I am blessed with.

3 comments:

  1. Hello,
    I am recently a widow at 31. My husband was 34 when he died. I read your story and felt that I could relate to your situation in a lot of ways. My husband was shot and killed in the driveway of our home - our first home that we bought together. He died in that driveway on July 21st. I just moved back into the house this past weekend and I am trying to figure out how to live life. I am so very sorry about the tragic death of your husband. I know how you feel and what you are going through. I can only imagine the pain you have felt during your journey and I just wanted to send you a message in case you ever wanted to have someone in a similar situation to talk to. Sending hugs your way..Take care,

    Tiffany

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  2. Tiffany, I am so sorry for what you had to endure as well. I remember when I first moved back into the house how empty it felt, yet I could still "feel" his presence there. I wish that I could say that it was easy, but it wasn't. I cried many more nights than I didn't. Even though I still cry for him now, I have more dry nights than I do crying nights. It doesn't necessarily get easier or better, you just learn to live with it. Take care, and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Ann

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  3. Hi Ann. I'm a fellow widow (5 years out). I wanted to tell you that I'm so happy that you are having more good days than bad. This widow road is a long and bumpy one. So glad you are able to make the best of each day. Paula

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