Sunday, May 8, 2011
Today is mother's day. While I love my mom and grandmother (Chris's grandmother really, but I consider her my grandmother), but I can't help but be a little sad today. I should be a mom. Chris and I should have a child together and we should be celebrating today as a family. But, we can't because some monster took him from us. Some monster destroyed that dream. Because of that monster, I sometimes feel that I will never be a mother. And for that, I hate him even more. How can I ever forgive such a creature for taking everything that I held dear and beloved away from me? I just can't find it in my heart because this was a deliberate and cruel act. I just don't think that I can find forgiveness for such a heinous creature. He took my precious husband and best friend away from me and he also took my future, my dreams and any chance at being a mother away. So, today should be a happy, joyful day and instead, I had to fight back tears. Happy days should not be spent like this.