Tuesday, June 15, 2010
I didn't know
I didn't know that the last time I kissed you, it would be the last time that I would ever kiss you. I didn't know that the last time that I said "goodbye", it would be the last time I ever said "goodbye." I had a chance to kiss you again, and I had a chance to say goodbye again. But, I didn't. I didn't because I thought I would get another chance. I didn't know that you were hurt so badly, you were talking to me. I didn't know that when I walked away, it would be the last time that I saw you alive. If I could go back to those moments, I would. If I could go back to that wonderful morning, I would. I would go back and fix this. But, I can't. I don't want to keep going, it is so painful. I didn't know that I could cry this much, my tears could overflow all the oceans in this world. But, I can't undo this tragedy. How am I supposed to go on living without you? We had so many dreams, my favorite was when we would talk about growing old, sitting on the porch and yelling at the cars going past. But, all of my dreams have been shattered. What am I supposed to do now? I am but a fraction of the person that I was before. I will continue to be a broken woman for the rest of my life. Having you in my life was the greatest gift that I could ever get. Having you ripped from my life was the worst thing that could ever happen to me. I didn't know just how much I loved you until you were taken from me. I didn't know how empty my world would become if you were not a part of my life. I just didn't know, and I wish that I did.